Some of the best storytellers in the world are tattoo artists. Real, honest-to-goodness monologists in the mold of Will Rogers and Lenny Bruce. Humorists and elocutionists, that's what they are. Gifted word weavers who take the most mundane happenstance and turn it into a fall-on-the-floor classic.

Jack Rudy is like that. His comments on the current political scene are as fresh and insightful as any rap by Mort Sahl or Bill Maher. Plus, believe it or not, Jack specializes in character voices. Like the time he phoned about doing a poster and had me going for fifteen minutes. I thought it was some punch-drunk fighter calling from a broken-down gymnasium in the Bronx. "I've got about fifty of 'em," he told me. What a combination. Now, if we can just get Jack in front of a microphone. I'd pay to see that.

Don Deaton is another one. Elegantly educated and well read, Deaton is a walking, talking history book. A bottomless well of tattoo lore. I'll never forget his hilarious story of the man who came into Bert Grimm's shop for parking-meter change and walked out with a tattoo. It's as good as anything Jerry Seinfeld ever told.

And, of course, Lyle Tuttle. Not only has the father of modern-day tattooing got a bigger storehouse of tattoo tales than any ten other people, he has enough one-liners to fill a volume, with plenty left over for a TV special. Heaven forbid if Lyle and Capt. Don Leslie ever got together under the same roof. One thing for sure, you wouldn't be talking much, but you'd laugh 'til you coughed up a lung. I can hear Don tell about being paid in monkeys a hundred times, and it's always different. Always unforgettable.

And then there's Tennessee Dave. And Henry Goldfield, of course. Did I mention Zeke Owen, Mike Bakaty and Mr. G? Every one of them should be sainted. They have a special gift of gab. They're fascinating and entertaining beyond measure. They add salt and pepper to any conversation and make even the most mundane narrative come alive before your eyes. Whether it's in a bar or a barber shop, a truck stop or a tattoo parlor, just hanging out with these word wizards is worth the trip at twice the price.

Hanky Panky is another one. And Mike Malone. Superb artists who make you laugh and learn something at the same time. We need more people like this. Outrageous, charismatic, bigger-than-life emissaries of the tattoo world.

There's a lot of negative stuff out there. If it ain't the air it's the water. If it's not the Republicans it's the Democrats. So, wherever Jack or Lyle or Zeke or Rollo get started, simply buy 'em a drink, pull up a chair and dig it. You're in for a treat if you do. And, best of all, it's doing something positive for the planet. Just think, you're helping to protect an endangered species.

Bob Baxter
Editor in Chief

baxter@skin&ink.com
www.skinandink.com